Celtic-ness and "The Woman Who Walked Into Doors"

This weekend, I went home to attend the Celtic Fling and Highland Games in Lancaster, PA at the Mt. Hope Estate and Winery (where they hold the PA Renassiance Faire every year). It's a whole weekend of Celtic bands playing on a variety of stages, and there's lots of singing, dancing, drinking, parading, and other such fun events. This year, my friend Anna went with me, and, as always happens when Anna and I and beer get together, we got all nostalgic about Ireland (where we both studied abroad) and college (we were friends, in the same program at SU). Which, of course, led us to talking about one of the classes we had together senior year: Contemporary Irish Novels. We read six of the most despressing novels ever for that class. So, I thought it would be only appropriate to blog about the only book from that class that I've actually reread (and brought with me).

"The Woman Who Walked Into Doors"
Roddy Doyle
Penguin, 1997
ISBN: 978-0140255126

Paula Spencer has just been widowed. The loss of her husband seems only to open the door, and through a very honest voice, she confesses and confronts the demons of her past and present.

This book is very hard to summarize, because the attraction of it is the voice. Paula Spencer is an abused housewife, a single mother (more or less), and an alcoholic. She unfolds a history of past abuses, from high school years to her present state. It's not really a plot driven book, but instead a character study. And Doyle really captures a voice. You feel that Paula is at least believable, if not a real person. And while the average reader cannot have the same experiences as Paula exactly, it is easy to sympathize with her. This book also casts a light on the world of domestic violence. It's chilling, the way Paula describes both the events and the aftermaths. She defends the violence to herself, and describes the doctor looks away from her broken arm, bruises, and cuts. It's very haunting, and it makes you wonder about the darker side of life that so many people might be hiding. We used to argue in class if it was affected once you found out a man had written it. Honestly, I don't think it really matters, except that Roddy Doyle is a master of the character voice. The book was believable, and it's one of those texts that sits in the back of my mind, always making me wonder.

"Pride and Prejudice and Zombies"

I would just like it to be noted that this blog has never been mentioned in class. Hmmm...

As promised (or threatened...)

"Pride and Prejudice and Zombies"
Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith
Quirk Productions, 2009
ISBN# 978-1594743344

Elizabeth Bennet is a master of zombie disposal. And most fortuitously, for Meryton is being overrun with the undead! But, will the arrival of the proud and lethal Mr. Darcy distract her from her battles. Can Elizabeth defeat the undead AND overcome her prejudice to reach a happy, if not bloody, ending?

"It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains."
Jane Austen's classic novel "Pride and Prejudice" lives again (pun) as a surprisingly entertaining zombie-fied version. If you have not read the original, you might not enjoy it as much, although there's still enough to find funny in it without the context. But, if you've read the original (or even seen the movie), you'll appreciate how it ll makes sense. This isn't a massive overhaul of the novel: this is just what "Pride and Prejudice" would have been if Jane Austen had been able to include the zombies the first time around. Grahame-Smith includes much of the original text and dialogue, and the situations actually make sense. Jane goes to Netherfield by horseback because of Mrs. Bennet's strange manner of matchmaking, but also because there's a better chance she'd be able to avoid zombies on the road. It's perfectly reasonable.
There have also been a few touches that, while immortalizing Austen's novel, also poke a little fun at the sentiment, if not the content. "The smoke from Darcy's musket hung in the air around him, wafting heavenward through his thick mane of chestnut hair." Not pure Austen, but it certainly does capture the mood that modern readers have created for Mr. Darcy. (Insert Fangirl Swoon here) And, the scene in which Elizabeth refuses Darcy is an excellent little interlude. Quite honestly, it's what I've always wanted to happen in the book. :)
Recommended for, if nothing else, the sheer silliness of it all.

*When I bought this book at the Pitt bookstore, the cashier was almost as excited as I was. "Wow!", quoth he "They made a book of this? That's awesome!" And then he asked me, very seriously, if I had a zombie contingency plan. I didn't then...but thanks to Sarah, I now know where to go if the Zombie Apocalypse happens while I'm in Oakland.*

Caution: Fluff! "The Lost Memoirs of Jane Austen"

I was on an Austen kick today, and breezed through "The Lost Memoirs of Jane Austen" at work today. I also got back my copy of 'Pride and Prejudice and Zombies", so look for that one in future. :)



"The Lost Memoirs of Jane Austen"
Syrie James
Avon A, 2007
ISBN: 978-0061341427

Jane Austen's lost tale of the love of her life and the events behind some of her greatest works.

Yeah, that's a very brief summary, but I can't really think about how to sum it up any better. The only thing that really makes this book work is a knowledge of other Jane Austen works (even if you've just seen the movies...). There are some overlaps in names, but it's so easy to pick out who's who from the novels. The bustling Mrs. Jenkins, the simpering Miss Steele, the ridiculous Mr. Collins. They're all there. And, of course, Jane Austen becomes her heroines by turns. It's easy to see her as Elinor Dashwood, and her relationship with her sister is very close to Jane Bennett and Elizabeth Bennett. All the events of the story focus on Austen finishing up her first real novel, Sense and Sensibility. The story follows Jane Austen and her romantic encounter with a Mr. Ashford, who resembles a certain Mr. Darcy. It's an entertaining little read, and definitely more fun if you have any Austen background.



For the record, I wrote this entry while watching the lastest film for "Pride and Prejudice" with Keira Knightley. Yes, I swoon over Mr. Darcy. But Mr. Knightley is still my all-time favorite.

Artemis Fowl

Artemis Fowl
Eoin Colfer
Scholastic, 2001
ISBN: 0-439-35600-8

Artemis Fowl is a criminal mastermind. Armed with a loyal bodyguard about the size of a small mountain and the twin wonders of money and connection, he's out to steal the most valuable treasure out there: The gold of the fairies. But Artemis might have met his match when he captures agent Holly Short, the first female officer of the LEPrecon Special Forces. Not only does he have to negotiate with the entire fairy world, but he'll be dealing with trolls, the Blue Rinse, and a kleptomaniac dwarf. And he's only twelve years old.

I do like the first Artemis Fowl book. Really, I do. I think there's a lot that's great about it. The cast of characters is excellent. There's a smart-mouthed centaur who's actually a gadget genius. The kleptomaniac dwarf is pretty awesome. And the relation between Holly Short and Commander Root is a great multi-faceted aspect of the book. It's a rare commodity in a YA book. Artemis is anot necessarily a great character. But, he is fascinating. One of the best features of the book is the way Artemis grows and changes. He's a snot-nosed, conniving little bugger, but he ends up having to deal with things that even snot-nosed, conniving little buggers shouldn't have to deal with. That's part of the reason why I have such problems with the sequels. Artemis Fowl grows and changes. And Colfer throws it away in the fourth book. Le sigh. Still, the first book is a great stand-alone, and definitely worth the read.

For the record, it's pronounced "Owen". I had a professor in Ireland with the same first name.

"Confessions of a Cineplex Heckler"

I realize I ahven't been writing about a lot of adult books here. I think it's because there are so few adult books on my shelf (excluding the fantastic number of David Eddings' books that I felt the urge to bring to Pittsburgh "just in case"), let alone adult books with plot. There are tons of non-fiction, list books, etc. So, I guess I'll throw some of those your way. Here's one for the grown-ups.

"Confessions of a Cineplex Heckler"
Joe Queenan
Hyperion, 2000
ISBN: 9-780786-884643

With unfailing sarcasm and snideness, Joe Queenan takes on Hollywood again, covering such important topics as Irish films that are pure blarney, why America likes to see good-looking actors pulverized, movies about nuns, and the mistreatment of ears.

Joe Queenan actually writes for Movieline magazine, and his articles are hilariously snarky. Even if you can only read one article in a sitting, it is worth it. Queenan takes on some of the biggest names and movies in history and really prings them down a peg. He's also great at doing "stunts" for articles. In a previous book, he impersonated Mickey Rourke's screen personas for a day. In this book, he attempts to watch all the Merchant & Ivory films released (this was in 2000), which is his own personal version of Hell, and masqueraded as the "Bad Movie Angel", who handed out refund to patrons who sat through dismal movies. And, in both books that I've read, he features a "Don't Try This At Home" article about stunts that appear in movies and how they translate in real life. For the record, Leonardo DiCaprio would not have been so chatty in real life whilst slowly drowning in the freezing Atlantic. Just the topics Queenan looks at are so off the wall, they're actually interesting. Queenan devotes an entire article on bad hair in movies, which seems like it wouldn't be that interesting, but it's actually hilarious. And this was before Tom Hanks' ridiculous hair in "The Da Vinci Code". Overall, I recommend Queenan's snark and antics. If anything, check out the indexes in his books. (Yes, I look at the indexes in books. Nerd.) Instead of just a straightforward list, entires include

Bridges, Jeff
Dead otter glued to side of head in The Vanishing, 144

Dancing, Dirty
Somehow never get mentioned in this otherwise thorough book

Luke, Saint
Only evangelist to notice Christ surgically reattaching ear lopped off Roman centurion, 48-9

Queenan, Bridget and Gordon
Light matches to father's feet in an effort to keep him awake during Merchant and Ivory's
Slave of New York, 91


His book "If You're Talking to Me, Your Career Must Be in Trouble" is also fantastic.

"Messenger"

As Promised: "Messenger"

Fair Warning: Here there be spoilers!

"Messenger"
Lois Lowry
Houghton Mifflin, 2004
ISBN: 978-0618404414

Matt has managed to escape from the brutish fens and now lives with The Blind Man in a village open to all those who seek sanctuary. But dark times are stirring. The forest, always open to Matt, is becoming darker and more sinister. And in the village, people are trading away their deepest selves for happiness that Matt can't see. Soon, talk turns to closing off the village, and Matt must make one more trip into the forest to bring The Blind Man's daughter back safely. His only hope is the gift he has, if only he knew when, and how, to use it.

"Messenger" is the third (and last) book that ties to "The Giver". Matt, as well as Kira and her blind father, appear as holdovers from "Gathering Blue", although several years have elapsed. And, if you didn't figure out who the leader of the village was from the last post, shame on you. (I'll give you a hint: a sled) This book is more outrightly dark than the other two. While "The Giver" was dark with its too-rational world, and "Gathering Blue" was dark with its cruel "Lord of the Flies"-esque life, "Messenger" has both physical manifestations of cruelty and the subtle attitude shifts. This is a little off topic, but I've always been more creeped out when human nature and survival instinct runs amok. Case in point: the movie "War of the Worlds", starring Tom Cruise and Dakota Fanning. It wasn't that great of a movie to begin with, but what stuck with me the most was a scene when Tom Cruise and his family are trying to escape. The power has gone out everywhere and, for some reason, cars refuse to run. Tom Cruise somehow manages to get a car running (I'm not sure how...maybe he just laid hands on it and said "The Power of Scientology compels you!"), and he and his family are caught in a crowd of people, who beat down the doors, break windows, and swarm over this car in their attempts to get away. That scene scared me more than any tripod-y alien ever would. The same sort of thing happens in "Messenger". Slowly, the people start to change and become more and more cruel, to the point of closing off the village. This isn't half as scary as a thousand people beating against a minivan, but you get the idea. Meanwhile, the forest is the physical bogeyman (kinda). Lowry's descriptions of the rot and decay is just vague enough to let your imagination fill in what it actually looks like. And, unlike the other two character-driven books, this one is very plot driven. (Okay, true, "The Giver" really picks up there at the end...but this one is plot most of the way through.) You're worried about Matt getting through the forest, you're wondering about this gift he has and what it all means, and then you're worried about him making safely out the other side with Kira in tow. And, while the ending is not exactly the most satisfying, at least it ends.

Personal note: I was surprised with this book by my dad, who went ahead and ordered it without telling me, right after it came out. I read it in a furious afternoon, and at one point threw the book onto my bed and screamed (not too loudly). So, yeah.

"Gathering Blue"

I have totally been missing out on my blog. Readers, I promise I will try to be more regular with updates. However, Summer Reading is upon us! (Cower, brief mortals!)
Here's the promised "Gathering Blue" post. I promise to post "Messenger" by Friday.

Fair Warning: Here there be spoilers!

"Gathering Blue"
Lois Lowry
Delacourt Books 2006
ISBN 978-0385732562

Kira has managed to live with a crippled leg and without a father, but when her mother dies as well, it is Kira's gift with threads that saves her from the cruel justice of her village. Now, Kira learns the art of dying and weaving,. becoming the sewer of the Robe and ensuring the yearly recitation of her village's history. But there are sinister forces at work, and when Kira seeks out blue for "Yonder", she discovers more to the world.

I am really terrible at doing these summaries. Ick. But, "Gathering Blue" is a companion/sequel to "The Giver". At first glance, it's impossible to find the connection. Both books are dystopias, but they function on opposite ends of the spectrum. While Jonas's world is order and peace, Kira's world is rough, unruly, and primitive. Families live in functional units within the village, but in the Fens, family scrape and squabble and fight for survival. Lowry does an excellent job at providing little snippets of the rude world of the Fens, but the majority of the action takes place in Kira's new home, the main building of the civilization, where Kira is taken after her parents die. Her crippled leg is a huge part of the story, as the village tends to drag those ruined (injured, sick, crippled) to the Field to die alone. Luckily, it is clear that Kira has a gift with thread. In a way, this makes her much like Jonas, who is labeled by his light eyes. Kira is joined in her work on the history of the town by Thomas, a boy with carving skills, and Jo, a child from the Fens who can sing. They'll be the ones to carry on the history, as well as record the present, on the Robe, Staff, and in the Song of the village. Whew. The story is not as complicated as it seems, but trying to relate makes it snarl a lot. The other pivotal character in "Gathering Blue" is Matt, a child from the Fens who is Kira's friend. He's very impish, mischievous, and generally adds a little comedy to the proceedings. But he is the one who goes off in search of the color blue to bring back to Kira and her threads. And, he's the one who discovers the others who live yonder. It's an entire community of "broken people", who had fled for their lives from other lands. Most importantly, Kira's father, who was not killed in a hunt but instead attacked by jealous rivals and left, blind and injured, for dead, was safely brought to this community, and is reunited with Kira through Matt, although he cannot stay. It's a very interesting view into the Darwinian justice of the village. Especially when you find out who attacked him. But, the primary message of the book is the realization by Matt, Thomas, and Kira (much like Jonas's) that the world they live in is much bigger than what they've been told, and that the only way to bring about the future is to change it themselves. The ol' turning-a-dystopia-into-a-utopia. In the end, Matt goes back with Kira's blinded father to the village of other. By the way, the village is led by a young man with light eyes.

Aha. Draw your own conclusions here. Then, read "Messenger" and see if you were right.